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October 16, 2009 / theoldsilly

DREaded Dr. Visit!

One of the joys of being a man in his late 50’s is the sheer exquisite experience of the annual physical that includes the delightful DRE (Digital Rectal Examination). Seriously. While it’s not quite the full blown pleasure of a colonoscopy like we are treated to every several years – 17,000 miles of tubing snaking up your arse and winding its way all thru your instestines until you can taste camera lens on the back of your palate –  it is a close second in all time favorite life experiences.DRE

And the guys who go to college to take up this career are so special. Ya gotta be a certain, erm …. way, to want to finger men’s hineys all day, right? And then I have to imagine there’s the gay clients who request, “Use two fingers, please doc?” That has to be a most satisfying session for both doc and patient. Special.

So enthralled am I with this charming, oh-so-manly procedure I did some searching for a suitable tribute to it. Please enjoy this video with the same joyous, heartfelt ear to ear smiles the Old Silly has as he drives across town on his way to turn a trick for the doc have his annual checkup-

Isn’t that just a stitch? And speaking of stitches, I may need … nah, not gonna go there – I’d wind up being the butt of that joke!

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  1. Enid Wilson / Oct 16 2009 5:32 am

    Oh oh, Marvin, you can blog just about anything.

    Steamy Darcy

  2. Elizabeth Spann Craig / Oct 16 2009 6:30 am

    Well, good luck with it Marvin! Better you than me. 🙂

    Mystery Writing is Murder

  3. unwriter1 / Oct 16 2009 6:46 am

    I’m ‘behind’ you all the way on this one. Let’s hope he grabs the right tube, as in the cream to make penetration easier and not the superglue. You’d look rather strange with a proctologist trailing behind you all the time.

    Worry if he starts to sing “Oh Holo meo”. That would indicate he loves his job a wee too much.

    • theoldsilly / Oct 16 2009 10:16 am

      Ah I can always tell the wise advice from someone who KNOWS, my friend! 😉

  4. Crystal Clear Proofing / Oct 16 2009 7:18 am

    Oh that was just so entertaining for a Friday – LOVED IT! Hey – don’t envy you guys at all…but be glad you don’t have to have annual colonoscopies! At least they put me to sleep!! (Not just the day-sleep!) WOO HOO! hahahaha

  5. Sylvia Dickey Smith / Oct 16 2009 7:46 am

    Oh, you’re in rare form today!! LOL

  6. AmyLK / Oct 16 2009 8:31 am

    Good luck with the visit. Thanks for the laugh on this Friday morning!

  7. ReformingGeek / Oct 16 2009 9:14 am

    I think I heard you scream down here in Texas.

    Take two aspirin and don’t call me in the morning.


    • theoldsilly / Oct 16 2009 11:32 am

      And for this your office charges $120 per visit? I’m in the wrong business!

  8. Karen Walker / Oct 16 2009 9:22 am

    Well, good luck. You know, us gals get poked from both ends when we go for gynecological exam, so guess I can’t feel too terribly sorry for you. Sorry.

  9. Jeannine Gardella / Oct 16 2009 10:11 am

    ………and let’s don’t forget those wonderful mammograms. A DRE is pretty benign in comparison 🙂

    • theoldsilly / Oct 16 2009 10:22 am

      Good lord yes, I’ve heard horror stories. Thank God there’s no penograms! 😉

  10. Katie Hines / Oct 16 2009 11:26 am

    LOL! Just what I’m looking forward to, but oh-so-necessary.

  11. Julie Lomoe / Oct 16 2009 11:30 am

    I hardly ever say this, but maybe this is TMI (too much information?) Brings back memories . . . oh, never mind.

    Julie Lomoe’s Musings Mysterioso

  12. quirkyloon / Oct 16 2009 12:43 pm





    Did I mention eeeek?


  13. Elspeth Antonelli / Oct 16 2009 1:40 pm

    Very funny! Thanks for the laugh and for painting a far too vivid picture!


  14. Cactus Annie / Oct 16 2009 4:31 pm

    Marv, you are incorigible – AND hysterical! Too funny, dude! 😉

    • theoldsilly / Oct 16 2009 4:38 pm

      Hmph – well funny to YOU, maybe! 😉

  15. CatLadyLarew / Oct 16 2009 4:53 pm

    The joys of aging! I get to do the colonoscopy every 5 years now… Thanks, Dad for having colon cancer! 😦 Some of us are just luckier than others I guess.

  16. Katrina Wampler / Oct 16 2009 5:09 pm

    Remember, I use to work in the OR… I can just imagine you coming in for your checkup…wait, maybe I don’t want to imagine that. hahahah

    so how you feeling today? Having trouble sitting long?

    • theoldsilly / Oct 16 2009 5:19 pm

      “Katrina, that is SO not funny,” said the Old Silly shifting his weight in his seat for an unsuccessful attempt at finding comfort.

  17. yvonne lewis / Oct 16 2009 5:51 pm

    Wonderful post and the sense of humour that came across albiet a serious examination, hope all went well.


  18. Deb / Oct 16 2009 6:39 pm

    Hope you had a gay old time, Marv!

    Misery loves company:
    Background: My Man Friend of 15 years & I are a decade younger than you – he is VERY naive when it comes to these things, I am not (former x-ray tech just outside of Boston).

    The Story: While out to dinner in a nice restaurant, I asked Mr. Man how his annual physical went that day. He put his fork down, leaned across the table, eyes as wide as saucers & whispered in all seriousness (he truly was mortified), “That doctor did things to me no man should ever have done.”

    I proceeded to snort my salad out my nose and got into one of those laughing jags – you know how you get laughing and you just can’t stop? Ever see the Chuckles the Clown episode of the Mary Tyler Moore Show?

    He grabbed my hand, still with that terrified look, and whispered, “Deb, it was horrible”.

    What iota of composure I was trying to hold on to blew out the window. THAT was one funny dinner!

    • theoldsilly / Oct 17 2009 7:37 am

      Wow Deb- lol, thanks for sharing THAT story. So DH got a rude awakening, eh? tee hee 😉

  19. Galen Kindley / Oct 16 2009 7:33 pm

    Get no sympathy from me, I just did this about three weeks ago. Butt, it wasn’t so bad. Even the blood taking part was pretty painless. Here’s a tip…not you yet, but, it will be eventually. Shingles vaccine for folks 60 and over. Everyone should get one. CDC recommends it and most insurance covers it. The alternative is not pleasant and can be avoid with one simple shot. Just do it. I did.

    Best Regards, Galen

    Imagineering Fiction Blog

    • theoldsilly / Oct 17 2009 7:38 am

      Yes sir! Thanks for the tip, cuz 60 is right around the corner for the Old Silly! 😉

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