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November 18, 2009 / theoldsilly

Hilarious Hump Day –

Back in the frontier days, a westbound wagon train was lost and low on food.


No other humans had been seen for days, when finally they saw
an old Jewish man sitting beneath a tree.
The leader rushed to him and said,
 
"We're lost and running out of food.
Is there someplace ahead where we can get food?

 "Vell," the old Jew said,
"I vouldn't go up dat hill und down other side.
Somevun told me you'll run into a big bacon tree."

 "A bacon tree?" asked the wagon train leader.

 "Yah, ah bacon tree. Trust me. For nuttin vud I lie."

 The leader goes back and tells his people that if nothing else,
they might be able to find food on the other side of the next ridge. 

"So why did he say not to go there?" some of the pioneers asked.

 "Oh, you know those Jews -- they don't eat bacon."


 So the wagon train goes up the hill and down the other side.
Suddenly,  Indians attack and massacre everyone except the leader,
who barely manages to escape.
He rushes back to the old Jew, who's enjoying a "glassel tea."
 The near-dead man starts shouting,
"You fool! You sent us to our deaths!
We followed your instructions, but there was no bacon tree!
There was hundreds of Indians, who killed everyone."

 The old Jew holds up his hand and says "Oy, vait a minute."
He then gets out an old English-Yiddish dictionary,
and begins thumbing through it.
 "Gevalt, I made myself ah big mistake.
It vuz not a bacon tree." He shook his head and said,

 “It vuz a ham bush!”

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26 Comments

Leave a Comment
  1. Elizabeth Spann Craig / Nov 18 2009 6:42 am

    I can always count on you to start my Wednesdays off with a smile, Marvin! Thanks for another one.

    Elizabeth
    Mystery Writing is Murder

  2. unwriter1 / Nov 18 2009 7:32 am

    Good grief. My kind of humor. Good one old silly

  3. Crystal Clear Proofing / Nov 18 2009 8:22 am

    I’m with Elizabeth – The Old Silly can definitely be counted on to begin Wednesdays with a smile! Have a good one, my friend! 😉

  4. Marcus Franks / Nov 18 2009 8:23 am

    Dis vas a vunderful von! lol – thanks for the morning chuckles, old silly.

  5. yvonne lewis / Nov 18 2009 8:48 am

    This made my day, tears of laughter at this one. look forward to the next/

    Yvonne.

  6. Cactus Annie / Nov 18 2009 8:58 am

    Hahahahaaaaa – loved it. Thanks for the yuks, Old Silly! 🙂

  7. tdryden1 / Nov 18 2009 9:00 am

    Where do you get this stuff???? So wonderful to be able to have a laugh first thing in the morning!!!
    Thanks, I needed that.

  8. Stanley Berber / Nov 18 2009 9:06 am

    Hysterical! 😉

  9. katrina / Nov 18 2009 10:16 am

    OMg… that is vay too funny.

  10. MadMadMargo / Nov 18 2009 10:27 am

    Very cute, thanks for the laugh!

  11. Barbra Kelser / Nov 18 2009 10:32 am

    Love Hilarious Hump Day on this blog – lol, good one today, old silly!

  12. Karen Walker / Nov 18 2009 11:23 am

    Oy vay, that was very funny! Thanks.
    Karen

  13. John Standish / Nov 18 2009 11:28 am

    Sides hurting – great punch line! 😉

  14. Jane Kennedy Sutton / Nov 18 2009 11:29 am

    Where do you come up with these! Thanks for the laugh – again.

  15. Helen Ginger / Nov 18 2009 11:31 am

    That was cute. I didn’t guess the punch line, so I had a good laugh. Thanks!

    Helen
    Straight From Hel

  16. Jean Henry Mead / Nov 18 2009 11:47 am

    LOL. It happened just down the trail here in Wyoming.

  17. quirkyloon / Nov 18 2009 12:22 pm

    Mwa mwa mwaaaaaaa!

    Barum bump!

    Are you here all week?

    hee hee

  18. Stephen Tremp / Nov 18 2009 1:59 pm

    Ovay! I see Mel Brooks from Men in Tights tipping his hat with the Jewish hair dangling from the hat.

    Stephen Tremp

  19. julielomoe / Nov 18 2009 2:23 pm

    Marvin, I loved this! And rest assured I’m working on my Old Silly post for Friday. This lets me know I can be even more outrageous than I thought.

    Julie Lomoe’s Musings Mysterioso
    http://julielomoe.wordpress.com

    • theoldsilly / Nov 18 2009 3:19 pm

      Julie, you can get as outrageous as your old hippie self wants on MY blog – free spirit, right? lol 😉

  20. L. Diane Wolfe / Nov 18 2009 3:08 pm

    Hey, he did tell them NOT to do it!

    • theoldsilly / Nov 18 2009 3:18 pm

      LOL – Diane, I was wondering if ANYone was going to catch that! 😉

  21. Thelma Banks / Nov 18 2009 3:55 pm

    Hahaha! I found this blog doing a Google search and LOVE it! I’ll be back. 🙂

  22. Karen Cioffi / Nov 18 2009 4:03 pm

    Very Funny!
    I just tweeted it.
    Karen Cioffi
    http://dkvwriting4u.com

  23. Galen Kindley / Nov 18 2009 5:43 pm

    Bada Bing, Bada Boom. Or is it Vada Ving, Vada Voom? Could make a difference.

    Best Regards, Galen

    Imagineering Fiction Blog

  24. Kevin Gassen / Nov 24 2009 1:13 pm

    I don’t usually write on blogs but had to on yours. You have a very easy to read writing style. A lot of people don’t have that touch, they just drone on and on in the most boring way. But not you – thanks! I don’t have time to read it all right now, I found this site when looking for something else on Yahoo, but I’ve bookmarked your homepage and will visit again soon to see the latest posts. I really enjoy reading about comedians. The worlds needs more laughter I think. Don’t you agree? Visit my site if you’d like to read more. Thanks again!

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